1 year

Today you are 1.  It feels like just yesterday you got here.

You are no longer tiny,

But are now becoming a big boy!

You love to walk and run around,

And are already musically inclined.

Veggie Tales are you very favorite,

you love special cuddle time with Daddy,

and bath and naked time.

 You are already a deep thinker,

 and love to be outside.

Usually you like meal time,

but are sometimes a little resistant.

And you know that animals are definitely friends.

So happy birthday my little lion!

I love you very much!

Count down begins!

We are down to 5 weeks before our new addition gets here!  And it's only 10 days till Zeke turns 1!  I can't believe how fast it's gone by.  We've really started trying to get the house ready.  Zeke's crib is now moved into the other room and we are working on getting him to sleep there the entire night.  It's a little extra difficult right now because we are dealing with a little bit of separation anxiety and he's teething, I can see 2 that are trying to cut thru right now, there may be more.

As Jasper's due date gets closer I'm getting, well, nervous.  Zeke's birth was less than ideal.  Actually if I'm honest it was horrible.  Here is the quick version.  My water broke first, at about 10pm, and when it broke my contractions stopped.  When we checked in we found out that Zeke had passed meconium.  Not a good sign.  I didn't really have any contractions all night and they wouldn't let me get up or walk around.  So at 6am I got a pitocin drip.  I didn't feel any contractions until around noon.  And even then they weren't that painful.  Well by the time 2pm hit that changed.  By 3pm I was to the point of tears.  I was at 3cm and 80% effaced, so that was encouraging. Unfortunately I spent the next 2 hours bawling and writhing in pain with each contraction.  The nurse checked me again and I had made absolutely no progress.  At that point I decided I needed help and that I needed an epidural.  Once I finally got it (which it self was an event.  The anesthesiologist ended up sticking me about 6 times before he was actually able to give me the medicine) I felt like a human again.  At 11pm it was time to start pushing.  And I pushed for 3 hours.  I was passing out between each push.  Zeke came out sideways, his face was facing my thigh and his hand was up at his face.  He was also grey and not breathing, during my labor he passed meconium 4 times, and each time it was progressively worse.  I remember being aware that he wasn't breathing but I couldn't really react because I passed out after I got him out.  I'm not really sure how long it was before they got him to breathe, but they did.  The brought him over and I got to hold him.  But they were still going to take him to the NICU because he wasn't breathing correctly and his temperature wasn't right.  Pam, Sara and Joe came over immediately and started praying for him while I held him.  Literally 1 minute later the nurse came back to take him to the NICU, she looked at him and said  "Oh.  He's breathing correctly!"  She looked at my delivery nurse and asked her to check his temp in 5 minutes and if it was normal he could stay with me.  His temp was normal!  He really is my little miracle baby.  I'm so thankful for him.

 In my head I know this birth won't be like Zeke's, but I'm still scared.  Part of me is still worried that it's going to be just as bad this time around.

Any encouragement as we get closer to the due date is very welcome :)

My Little Garden

Someday I hope to have a full vegetable garden, or at least a several raised bed.  Actually that's not entirely true.  I would love a fair amount of land and have a full garden.  And chickens.  My dear friend Katie has a beautiful ranchette that I am in love with and trying very hard not to be jealous of.  But that amount of land scares my husband a bit.  Although we do hope to own a home that has at the very least a generous backyard. But for now I do not have a back yard.  Just my little patio.  So my garden consists of this.

It may be small, but it's a start.

Ignore all the grass and weeds around.  We have this giant open field behind out apartments.  Believe it or not I had all the weeds cleared before winter.  Sigh.
Joe is going to take care of the back patio for me, since it's allergy season.  Plus we are going to turn the backyard into at least a playable area for the little lion and get him a little kiddie pool.  He loves the water and what better way to beat the Redding heat?

Behind our apartment we have a very large grass and weed covered field.  Sometimes I think about renting a roto-tiller and planting a larger garden in the field but I'm not sure if it's a good idea.